Chuck Norris Vs. Mario
All of the earth held their breath. The spectacle was about to begin. A storm churned above Time Sq.New York, as if nature herself had come to witness the great event. Town had been abandoned in concern, however that didn’t cease each man, girl, and youngster from huddling round their Television screens to observe the stay streaming of this colossal moment.
A Clash of Titans.
A Battle for the Ages.
A Warfare between two nice Powers.
The ultimate Showdown.
The cameras zoomed in on a brief, thick determine, approaching from the one side of the street. He wore dirty overalls and a white shirt over his bulging, muscular body. Thick brows and a dark mustache framed his face. A pink hat was cocked sideways on his head, a strong M emblazoned in its entrance.
A pre-recorded voice sounds over every speaker.
“Introducing, the Defender of Mushroom Kingdom, Bane of Bowser, Husband of Princess Peach, The Nintendo OG, Super MARIO!!!”
The world over, individuals cheered. In stadiums, town squares, dwelling rooms, resorts, and waiting rooms, they roared their approval.
Mario executed a majestic front-flip, then winked at the camera. As one, every lady on Earth swooned.
The cameras then changed their focus to a different man, coming from the alternative route. He wore a brown vest and ripped blue denims. His powerful eyes glared out from beneath the brim of his cowboy hat. A goatee of pure energy bristled along his stone-set face.
The ladies started to swoon once more.
“Introducing, the Walker Texas Ranger! Inventor of the Round Home Kick! Undefeated martial arts warrior! 77 time recipient of the Manliest Man Alive Award. The man who created the Grand Canyon just by skydiving…Roadhouse…CHUCK NORRIS!!”
Norris pulled a machine gun from beneath his jacket and leveled it at Mario.
“BEGIN!!” The voice roared.
Mario took off at an uncannily fast sprint, running headlong into the barrage of bullets coming in his path. With ridiculous agility, he leaped in the air and continued to run upon the metal, impossibly hopping from round to spherical without slowing in pace. With one remaining flip he introduced his fist across Chuck’s chin.
Norris took the blow just like the man he’s, then, grabbing Mario by the wrist, spun and hurled him through the window of a close by car. He open fired, and the bullets collided with the plumber as he began to scramble to his toes.
Thankfully, the rounds struck Mario within the mustache, which caught them, absorbing the metallic. A stream of fireplace leaped from the man’s small hands, roaring toward Norris. However, upon seeing the ranger’s highly effective dying glare, the blaze parted around him, and burned the building behind him to the ground as a substitute.
“Let’s go.” Grunted the gruff American hero.
The 2 titans charged, their fists colliding with one another in the center of the street. The resulting shock wave that emanated forth flattened the entirety of new York City and shattered each pane of glass on the planet. The world over, individuals panicked as their Television’s erupted into millions of pieces as they regarded on in terror.
To the mortal eye, what adopted subsequent was a violent blur of brown and red, a horrible flaming twister of chaotic battle. Had been the viewer one way or the other able to seeing sights a thousand, nay, 1,000,000 times faster than the average eye, then he would observe the best match-up that ever occurred. Norris’ martial arts superiority was evident, his excellent kicks, punches and throws followed one after the opposite with ridiculous smoothness. However Tremendous Mario was a creature of speed and agility. He leaped and flipped about with a practiced quickness that would put any gymnast to absolute shame. He rained powerful strike after powerful strike during his whirlwind of movement.
Chuck narrowed his eyes and calculated the plumber’s flight path. He spun on his heel and launched the signature roundhouse kick. A sonic boom rang out because the foot collided with Mario and broke the sound barrier simultaneously.
Before the Defender of Mushroom Kingdom could blink he was soaring head over heels above the Atlantic Ocean, the new York coastline fading away. With a flick of Mario’s will, his trusty red cap sprouted eagle’s wings. He turned in a loop and sped again towards town.
He had almost reached Ellis Island when he saw his opponent riding a Killer Whale in his direction, shaking his fist defiantly as he rode the waves. Mario circled, launching fireball after fireball on the foe beneath. The fire barely singed Norris’ jacket (and didn’t do a thing to his sponsored Levi’s blue jeans), but the whale screamed in agony and sunk in the flames. Chuck jumped from the creatures back, kung fu position assumed, he hurtled straight towards Mario four hundred feet up.
With a roar, Mario changed his fist to steel and struck Norris, sending him into the crown of the Statue of Liberty (and ensuing in the demise of the whole monument). But, never lacking a step, the mighty Texas Ranger shortly began to hurl rubble and debris in the flying Italian’s path. The torch found its mark, and Mario hit the ground.
The little plumber crawled out of the outlet model snow-angel he’d created upon impact, his huge, bushy chest was now exposed as his ripped overalls fell off his smoking type. Groping by way of his pockets, he found half a dozen smashed mushrooms in a zip lock bag. He popped the entirety of it in his mouth, chewing up the plastic and fungi alike with his titanium teeth.,
Norris emerged from the rubble epically. Seeing Mario had lost his shirt, he too shed his vest, revealing that perfect body that only Complete Gym House Workout Station can produce. In fact, he didn’t take away his cowboy hat.
The mushrooms rapidly did their work on Mario, and he started to grow in size at an alarming rate. Even Chuck stood in awe for a moment because the formerly small man grew to fifty toes tall. The fireballs on his fingers have been the dimensions of homes. The ground crackled beneath his feet.
But his opponent was not but completed. With an epic whinny, a horse appeared beneath Norris. The man gave an American yell and galloped forward to fulfill the enormous.
What followed cannot be properly described by word, written or verbal. How can such a battle be spoken of Shall I tell of the best way the rider struck the gigantic Mario’s knees Or of how he skilfully evaded blasts of heat Shall I converse of how, defying all laws of physics, he galloped up the aspect of his opponent’s physique Or perhaps how Mario then seized horse and rider, hurling them in the direction of the sea. That was the end of the steed, however Norris gave stone island jacket xl a magnificent bounce and collided with the gigantic sternum, swinging from chest hair to chest hair as he struck each exposed inch of skin.
Lastly, with a scream of pain, Mario reverted to regular size, and both males hit the bottom.
Birds began to circle round Ellis Island, as did the clouds. Lightning flashed overhead.
Chuck drew a hunting knife.
Mario withdrew a hulking warhammer of bronze.
The plumber wielded the hammer as if it weighed nothing. He spun and jumped, spinning and striking with the deadly instrument. Seven times his instrument of doom fell, and seven occasions Norris was slammed with power equal to that of a nuclear blast…simply enough to dent his abs of steel. In response, he gashed at Mario along with his blade, carving several bloody furrows into his arms and shoulders.
By some chance the knife and hammer made contact, and both shattered. The earth trembled.
“It’s-a-oveer” Hissed Mario in his Italian Dialect, “You are-a-beaten. I’m invincible.”
“Prove it, punk.” Spat Norris.
Mario reached up towards the heavens, and the sky split in two. Above him circled twelve blazing balls of energy: the mighty Star Spirits. Lightning descends, overwhelming the small plumber. A moment passes, and in place of the small man is a churning mass of energy, reflecting every shade, possible or otherwise. A hideous sort of melody floor itself into existence from the very air itself. The being Mario had become crackled with invincibility.
However Chuck had a few methods up his personal sleeve.
With a roar, he took off at full pace. His sprint was so quick that he was in a position to run around the planet and roundhouse kick himself within the back, imbuing him with energy indescribable.